As a life coach, my job is to help people see the truth so that they can accept it, transform it and move forward. This is difficult for most positive people. Why? Because positive thinking has been taught to so many of us as “the way” when in fact, it is the impact of a particular perspective.
Meaning, when you adopt positive modes of thinking, you are practicing the effect of something else. This makes it inauthentic. Most positive people, when pressed, admit that there are a lot of things they are unhappy about. “But I shouldn’t talk about them Matthew because that is negative!!” they tell me.
Not true. To have a host of areas of your life that you are unhappy with and then be positive about them is like putting your head in the sand. I call it the Rose Garden with the Sewer underneath.
Okay. Positivity is important, powerful and life transforming. But it is the natural affect of being able to accept and effectively dealing with all that doesn’t work in your life. That’s where myself and my coaches come in for most people.
Even more importantly, negativity is really good. Negativity creates desire. Negativity is the seed of creativity. Negativity is the fountain of innovation and change. Without negativity we would all be sitting around doing nothing.
Negativity is not so good when you resist it and can’t allow it to exist in your life.
Posted in Featured, Inner Peace
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Tags:
breakdown, Drunk Monkey, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Mindset, negative emotions, Peace of Mind, Positive Attitude, truth, unhappy
It’s hard to be happy when you forget that your life is temporary, transient and basically meaningless. Profound happiness can not be achieved by speculating about the future or contemplating the past. Yet The Drunk Monkey spends endless time on the past and future.
Your life you will go up, down, all around and then you die. When you die the people in your life will throw dirt on your face and have a party. In 100 years, it’s likely your life will be completely forgotten and irrelevant.
“Seriousness is a disease of the ego.”
That’s what my mentor, Stewart Wilde, told me in my 20’s. I didn’t understand what he meant until my late 30’s. I was so rapped up in succeeding, getting ahead and showing the world that I am valuable. Sometimes it worked, other times it didn’t. My emotions were yanked from positive to negative based on the external events. My experience of life was messed up by my expectations.
Today I see my clients making their lives miserable by judging and comparing this moment to the elusive “Should Be”. By focusing on what should have been or what might be they make themselves miserable. It took me a long time to realize that breakdowns lead to breakthroughs and therefore worrying about it is irrelevant. To worry, stress and freak out messes with the point of this life. The Now. That is where the profound sense of happiness and fulfillment lies.
No matter how much you try, you will die. Life is not serious or important. To believe that this life is important leads to all sorts of negative experiences. Rest assured, life will contradict your opinion and if you think it should be other then it is… you will be unhappy. Life is doing what ever it is doing regardless of your opinion. Let it go and enjoy today, okay?
Posted in Featured, Inner Peace
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Tags:
breakdown, Drunk Monkey, ego, fulfillment, Happiness, Life Coach, Life Coaching, stewart wilde, stress, unhappy
